Since Bloomberg’s ban on sugary drinks larger than 16 oz was banned, let’s raise oa glass!
To celebrate our right to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Diabetes, we’ve created the sugariest drink in the world.
1 part Coca-Cola
1 part Yoo-hoo
1 part Starbucks Vanilla Frappuccino
1 part Red Bull
1 part Mountain Dew Kickstart, Mountain Dew’s inexplicable new energy drink
1 part Pillsbury Funfetti cake frosting
1 part Marshmallow Fluff
1 part Hummingbird Food (We actually couldn’t find any, due to supply chain issues and a Divine Force protecting us.)
1 part Mrs. Butterworth’s pancake syrup
1 part aerosol whipped cream
1 part Kool-Aid
1 part Cadbury Creme Egg creme (You’ll have to extract the creme yourself, because for some reason they don’t yet sell it on its own. If you’re trying to eat healthy, just use the Cadbury Creme Egg white.)
1 part Nutella
1 part sugar
1 part Country Time Lemonade Mix
1 part Gatorade (for fitness!)
Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me! Yeah, we know it’s Thursday.
I really heart Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!!